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Getting Back on the Saddle to Living a Life You Love

No matter who you are or what you desire in your life, there will have been a time when you feel as if you’ve gotten off track to your goals and desires.

And I get it. We move forward two paces and take one step back. Then we make these huge leaps forward and need to stand still and catch our dale-buttermilk-tvbreath.  It’s part of the cycle of living.

There will be a time during this cycle when you realize it was time for me to get back in the saddle, so to speak.

Maybe, like me, you got off track in your goals around fitness because you got involved in a project for work. Maybe you were working on a book, or wrote in your journal lately, but had to handle a family crisis.

Or maybe, you just got frustrated because you weren’t getting the exact outcome you desired.

I thought we’d venture out together and get back on the saddle of living the life of our deepest desires. Because, baby I’m all about boldly towards a goal, dream or desire. And I know that you have big dreams and goals, too.

So, here’s fourteen tricks for getting back in the saddle towards what you want.  Because, baby, it’s never too late to get back on the horse, even if you fell of years ago!

Say Hello to Awareness

Be honest with yourself and examine the past few months in your life. Where exactly did you get off path? What was the trigger? What was the fear around it? When did a delight become a should?  This isn’t about beating yourself up for stopping your forward motion or abandoning an idea. It’s simply looking with curiosity, and stepping away from judgment. Awareness is a beautiful thing!

Listen to Your Heart

What do you want, darling? Don’t choose some unrealistic goal based on some arbitrary outside expectation. Figure out how you want to feel and create a goal focused on that feeling. Listen to the soft voice of your heart for the answers, because your heart knows what you really desire. Don’t hesitate to dive into mediation or prayer. And don’t underestimate the value of working things out on paper. (Clearing Brain Clutter is a spectacular way to figure out what you want)

Allow Yourself a Fresh Start

Every day is an opportunity to begin fresh.  You can adjust your focus, change your words of the year, get back on path and rededicate yourself to your desires any day. Give yourself permission.

Create a Plan

Though rigidity isn’t a way to move forward with a lasting change, it’s hard to go in any direction without a plan. This doesn’t have to be a detailed plan, but at least create a general plan based on how you want to feel and the vision of where you want to go. (Clearing Soul Clutter begins Oct. 12th and can help)

Focus on One Thing

I’m a huge fan of big change and know that it’s possible. I did it at the end of 2010. I also know that big changes don’t happen overnight. Choose one are of your life to focus on and allow the others to fall into place. Trying to “fix” everything at once will be like throwing spaghetti at the wall: some of it will stick, some of it will fall to the wayside, and no matter where it lands, you’re going to have a mess. Honing your focus to one thing allows you to create a habit that sticks before you tackle something new.

Save the Date

Like choosing a date for a wedding, mark a date on your calendar that will signal the First Day of your new plan to begin. Like the first day of fall or the first day of school, choosing a date comforts your mind and gives you a target for giving your intention legs. Mark it on your calendar. Share this date with friends or family members. Tweet it. Blog it. Sing it to the world.

Embrace Structure

Don’t underestimate how supportive nourishing routines can be.  While they may seem restrictive, routines are actually about freedom.  Routines help you manage your energy effectively so that you can channel it towards your real desires and purpose.  Routines fuel your day and nourish your spirit. What structure do you need to put into place to support your goal or desire?

Add Review

A weekly review allows you to really sharpen your intuitive focus so that the things that really matter to you don’t fall away in the busy-ness.   It lets you to see where you’ve been and where you’re heading. A weekly review is one of the keys to staying on top of projects and assignments while helping keep you on track for your goals. This is the time to ask if what you’re doing is actually moving you towards your desired feeling.

Create a Minimum Weekly Requirement

As a part of my weekly review time, I create a minimum weekly requirement for the coming week. Maybe it’s 10 minutes of writing a day or a walk three days next week. Maybe it’s 100 push-ups during the coming week. Commit to a minimum for the coming week that feels both doable and a bit of a push.

Make No Excuses

Be honest with yourself about what you’ve done and where you are. Not meet your minimum weekly requirement?  Why?  You don’t have to answer to anyone but yourself, but no matter what bumps in the road you had, don’t make excuses or justify why you didn’t.  Choose to accept you did what you could, the best that you could, and move forward.

Forgive Yourself

I’m all about the concept of Compassionate Discipline. As humans want to experience pleasure over pain (at least most of the time).  Words like “goals” “discipline” and “action” seem worlds away from pleasure.  Of course I want to feel good.  I want ease and flow!  I want unlimited cupcakes, lattes and days where my writing flows and my morning run is fabulous.

Compassionate discipline brings  clarity and deliberateness to the game and trumps that a momentary tantrum.

It also means that when we don’t meet our goals, we don’t beat ourselves up.  Instead, compassionate discipline allows us to forgive ourselves and move forward.

Treat Yourself

Set up rewards for yourself for moving forward. Maybe it’s flowers from the grocery store or a coffee date with a friend. Maybe it’s a special date night or new mascara. My reward for sticking to better body care has been the bi-weekly commitment of a regular massage.

Be Accountable & Get Help

Get someone else on your team.  Though you have to do the work yourself, it doesn’t mean that you can’t get support or get help.  Hire a coach. Join a class. Find a trainer. Get a walking buddy. Tell your best friend. Enlist your partner. Give someone else permission to ask where you are on your goals. (JB is my accountability partner on my movement goals and we’re stretching together!)

Celebrate

Darling, there’s nothing better than a little celebration about your progress. Record it in your journal. Tweet it. Brag on your Facebook Page. Don’t make light of your accomplishments! It isn’t egotistical to celebrate.

Darling, life is indeed short, but it is never too late to create the kind of life you desire. And in order to create that life you want – and deserve – it means you have to take action. Try these tricks for getting back in the saddle around one of your goals.  So, fess up: what area of your life do you want to change before the end of the year? What do you want to create? What do you want, baby?

Image is of the Lovely Dale Evans, whom I met when I was 12. Her mother was in the same hospital as my grandmother.She was long retired and an utterly beautiful human soul.

IWant more details? Click Here to learn more about Clearing Soul Clutter (Creating Your Vision).

2015 – Course Dates:

  • Sunday, March 29, 2015 to Tuesday, April 28, 2015
  • Sunday, September 13, 2015 to Tuesday, October 13, 2015



A Vision Begins with Awareness

Once upon a time, I believed that I could fix my life (and my marriage) by getting Redfintailcarskinny, making a lot of money and surrounding myself with stuff.  I created unrealistic ideals of how life would be “perfect” if I could just get “there.”

And I believed that by getting “there” I would suddenly change all of the screwed up dynamics in my family.

In the meantime, I put on all the masks and disguises to make it appear as if I were living the perfect white-picket-fence life.  And, frankly my dear, it was exhausting.

So, a few things were wrong with my thinking:

  • I believed that looking at – and changing – external factors could create satisfaction with life.
  • I believed in the mythical “there” and that if I could just reach “there” I would be happy.
  • I believed that I could change others by morphing myself into who they wanted me to be.
  • I believed that what I wanted and desired wasn’t important.
  • I believed all kinds of “truths” about myself. I believed lies and excuses over what I knew in my heart.

And then, one day, the lock on the gate to my perfect white-picket fence-appearing life rusted right off and the gate opened.  For months (and months) I gazed upon the grass outside the open gate, too afraid to put a toe across the line.

And, as anyone who has taken their own walk through the fire will tell you, I had to hit rock bottom in my marriage and life in order to gather enough courage to walk out that damned gate.

What did it take for me to put on my big-girl panties and my best high heels?

A real good understanding of this thing called “acceptance,” and the realization  that I no longer wanted to tolerate a hell of a lot of things in my life.

  • I didn’t want to tolerate a façade of a marriage.
  • I didn’t want to tolerate a life without love, intimacy and sex.
  • I didn’t want to tolerate sacrificing my dreams in an attempt to make someone else happy.
  • I didn’t want to tolerate the constant wearing of masks in every moment of existence.
  • I didn’t want to tolerate not living and not creating.
  • I didn’t want to tolerate ignoring my basic needs of self-care.
  • I didn’t want to tolerate having no faith in myself, my innate creativity or my intuition.

So, what did I do?  I put on some sexy high heels, armored myself with stockings and lipstick, and gathered enough faith and courage to step out of the damned gate.

Of course, now that I had this epiphany around the concepts of love and faith and courage, I became impatient to get  to create change.  NOW.  I wanted to jump ahead and transform my life overnight.

I wanted to leave every single thing I had tolerated for so many years behind.

Let me tell you, sister.   Though fairy tales and rock stars make us believe that there is an opportunity to be an overnight success, in reality, that just doesn’t happen.  You have to begin exactly where you are.

Change takes time. It’s about baby steps.  It’s about choosing a destination and plotting a course. And it’s about beginning to move forward.

I believe that amazing and radical changes are possible.  But they don’t happen overnight.  You plant seeds, push the dirt of resistance aside, and eventually you begin to bloom.

The true keys to creating a life you love include:

  • Awareness of where you are and what you are tolerating.
  • Accepting the fact that you can only begin where you are (and that you cannot skip ahead to the fun or juicy parts).
  • Creating a vision of who you want to be, what you want to do with you time and your life, and how you want that to look.
  • Planning the steps on how to get there.
  • Taking action.  Yes, darling, you have to get dirt under you nails.

I’ll be flat out honest with you, baby: sometimes growing in awareness and clarity can be painful, especially if you judge yourself for what you might see.

And it isn’t sexy.  In fact, during my most aware moments, I was a hot mess.

But then, there is the other side of awareness: it’s like stepping into a crystal clear stream on a hot Texas Day: cooling and refreshing.

Refreshing because you are taking off your masks and standing in the glorious nakedness of who you were born to be in this world.

And when you begin leaning into the awareness…accepting where you are… this is when you begin creating a life you want to live instead of simply existing or reacting.

What about you, darling?  Are you ready to make changes in your life?  Are you ready to let go of the excuses?  Are you ready to be honest with yourself as to what you really desire in your life?

What is the brutal reality of the number one thing you are tolerating?

Are you ready to be held accountable for what you say you want?  Are you ready to take responsibility for changing your life and let go of the blame game?

Then, darling.  It’s time.  It’s time to embrace the awareness.  Yes, darling, the good, the bad and the ugly parts of it.  It’s time to take that awareness, accept where you are and create a plan to make your dreams a reality.

You can do it, darling.  You deserve it. I have so much faith.

Are you where I was a decade ago:  standing on the edges afraid to take that first step into awareness?  Want help hashing out a vision and a plan in order to create a life you love? Get some help.

Create your Big Juicy Vision + a Plan: 30 Days to Clarity – Clearing Soul Clutter – Creating Your Vision
Want more details? Click Here to learn more about Clearing Soul Clutter (Creating Your Vision).

2015 – Course Dates:

  • Sunday, March 29, 2015 to Tuesday, April 28, 2015
  • Sunday, September 13, 2015 to Tuesday, October 13, 2015



And if group coaching isn’t your thing, check out my one-on-one coaching opportunities.  Schedule a chat with me.  And if we aren’t a fit? Ask me for a referral to a coach who may better fit your needs.

Snag My Secret for Getting Clear

Darling, are you tired of colliding thoughts? Do you feel as if your passions have been buried under layers and layers of existing? Are you so overwhelmed with “to-dos” that you don’t have time to acknowledge what you really desire?

brainclutter_writingAre you channeling Scarlett O’Hara and vowing to think about what you really want tomorrow?

Would you like to know my secret for getting clearer about what you want, an effective trick for making a decision, a path to tame battling thoughts and gain clarity around just about anything troubling your mind?

Putting words to paper.

One of the biggest challenges my clients discuss with me is around clutter.

Clients tell me about colliding thoughts and overwhelming to-do lists.   Important tasks are forgotten.  Long term desires and goals are ignored because there “isn’t enough time” to put them in our schedules.

I’m sure you were hoping I’d gift you with a magic wand that you could wave to make your heart’s desires crystal clear.

Or a magic pill that would suddenly part the clouds in your mind like the sun on a rainy day.

Or a the secret location to a mystic waterfall that will wash away your the layers hardening your heart.

Darling, the truth is that you have to get a little ink on your fingers to clear that mental clutter.

It seems both simple and daunting to ponder.  However, let me share with you what can happen when you take what’s swirling around in your head and committing it to paper:

  • Take inventory
  • Remember the details
  • Frees up mental capacity
  • Gets you unstuck
  • Refine ideas
  • Break down big and vague ideas into something manageable
  • Create manageable tasks
  • Create awareness
  • Unearth the truth
  • Discover your heart’s desires
  • Uncover your soul’s needs
  • Delete what is draining your energy
  • Release pain
  • Choose where to put your focus
  • Filter out reactionary actions
  • Seal a vow between your heart and your mind
  • Create a vision
  • Pinpoint what actions are more effective
  • Take Action
  • Record moments of self-realization
  • Create new paths of thought
  • Promote emotional healing
  • Remind yourself of new routines until they become habits
  • Monitor your progress
  • Stay on track
  • Create a life you love

So, darling, if you want to go from dreamer to do-er, grab a pen and paper (or sit down to a blank page at your keyboard) and take the swirling fragments in your head and release them into the world.

I have so much faith that you can peel away the layers around your heart and create a life you adore.

Are you ready to clear your mind but not sure where to start? Need a little help uncovering the answers?  Realize you’re not quite sure what questions to even ask yourself? 30 Days to Clarity: Clearing Brain Clutter – Discovering Your Heart’s Desires is a loving place to start.

Now Available as a Fully-Downloadable Course.

Upon signing up you’ll receive a workbook containing all 30 lessons. There are also dozens of worksheets and writing prompts to take you from cobwebs in your brain to a clear thinking and the ability to listen to the small, still voice of your heart.

No more waiting for the course to begin or that next email. You can begin at any time.

ClarityPurchaseButton

You deserve to fall head over heels in love with your life.  Let me help you methodically baby-step your way from brain clutter to mental clarity.

The Investment: $21

Discover Your Inner Wisdom

By Clearing Brain Clutter

I want to share a secret with you, darling.  You are incredibly wise.

ladylikeWhen I ask you what you most desire, what do you answer?  To be honest, many of you will say “I don’t know” and believe that it’s an honest answer.  But here’s the deal kitten:  You do know.  You have the answers deep inside of you.

Sometimes, the desires of our hearts  feel like they’re  lost to us, but the truth is that they not lost;  they are merely buried.  Buried under the “need tos” and the “shoulds” and the “keeping up with the Jones and Smiths.”

I know you may not believe me. Ten years ago, I wouldn’t have believed me.  I was in a miserable, loveless marriage that was sucking all the desire, drive, and creativity from my soul.

So what changed for me?

  • I wanted to stop hurting.  I wanted to stop being miserable and heartbroken and depressed.
  • I wanted to feel again.  I wanted to end the destructive ways I was numbing myself:   food, alcohol, over-exercising, filling my schedule to overflowing.
  • I wanted to be loved for exactly who I was .

How did I change it?

  • I got help.  Because, baby, sometimes we simply need a guide to find our way back to who we really are, and to what we are meant to create in this world.
  • I realized that I had a choice.  I could choose my thoughts.  I could choose how I wanted to feel I was always in choice.  And I’ll admit that even in recent months, I have to be reminded of this.
  • I learned that when I stopped numbing, I did feel the icky stuff, but it passed. The bonus, though, was that I always began feeling the really wonderful stuff again – happiness, joy, desire.  You see, when you numb the bad feelings, you numb it all.
  • I found gratitude.
  • I cleared clutter.  I ditched all kinds of physical clutter in my world.  I began clearing the crappy thoughts crowding my mind.    All the shitty and hateful voices that told me I wasn’t good enough.
  • I stopped asking those powerless rhetorical questions like “why me?” and began asking the right kind of questions, like “who do I want to be in this world?” and “what do I want to do?”
  • I stopped being a victim in my own life.  It was time to be the heroine of my own story, not the tragically flawed supporting character.
  • I began to explore.  I explored the similarities between myself and others.  I discovered how I was different from my fellow travelers.
  • I began to let go of perfection.   I stopped  trying to make everyone else happy.
  • I allowed the layers to fall away, understanding that sometimes, I would get hurt without my protective walls around my heart.  I learned however, that this allowed me to feel electric and alive.
  • I learned to love again.  I learned to love myself and I allowed myself to fall in love with others.  I learned that by loving myself, and accepting myself for who I was at any particular moment, I could step way the moments of loathing.
  • I learned to trust.  To trust my instincts. To listen to my heart. To trust in others.
  • I learned that the passion I allowed to blossom in my heart was actually a fire that burned away the fears.

Let me be frank, my darling.  These are all lessons I am still learning

After leaving behind the miserable person I was and stepping towards and into a life I was head over heels in love, I came to understand the fact that there is no “there” in this evolution of love and life.  But baby, it’s all about the upward trajectory of finding ways to love life even more.

Darling, you can fall in love with your life.

You can write yourself a permission slip to simply be wholly you.  You can find the ways to being comfortable in your own skin.  You can learn to hear the small quiet voice of your heart to discover the answers you need to live a life your love.

You may just need a little help as you take those steps towards creating the life you desire.

30 Days to Clarity: Clearing Brain Clutter  is a great first step to discovering your inner wisdom.

Getting help was the first step for me to this life that I love.  And the deep sense of peace that I am evolving into the person I was meant to be.  That I am creating what I was meant to create.

Are you ready to clear your mind but not sure where to start? Need a little help uncovering the answers? Realize you’re not quite sure what questions to even ask yourself? 30 Days to Clarity: Clearing Brain Clutter – Discovering Your Heart’s Desires is a loving place to start.

Now Available as a Fully-Downloadable Course.

Upon signing up you’ll receive a workbook containing all 30 lessons. There are also dozens of worksheets and writing prompts to take you from cobwebs in your brain to a clear thinking and the ability to listen to the small, still voice of your heart.

No more waiting for the course to begin or that next email. You can begin at any time.

ClarityPurchaseButton
Designed to help you clear out the brain clutter that is drowning out the voices of your heart and soul. You’ll gain clarity by getting to know yourself and what the core of you really want.

You deserve to fall head over heels in love with your life. You, my darling, are the living embodiment of wisdom.

The Investment: $21

Are You Avoiding the Questions?

Because The Answers Scare You?

We sat across the table from each other, sharing hot cups of coffee and pieces of a decadent chocolate cake I had made earlier in the ladieswholunchweek. One of my closest friends had come over to catch up.

We talked of love and fear and laughter and home and the daily joys and challenges of living. We shared secrets as easily as we’d shared the cream and the sugar for the coffee.

She was clearly unhappy.

Then I asked her a question I’ve asked I’ve asked a kajillion times before:

Darling, what do YOU want?

And then came the pain. The heart- wrenching can’t-catch-your-breath kind of pain. The kind of pain that no amount of chocolate cake can assuage.

We talked about existing and feeling numb instead of truly embracing life and living it. And she uttered the words to me that I had heard more times that I want to count from girlfriends and clients and strangers who have conversed with me over the last few years:

“I don’t know if I want to ask those questions because I’m afraid of the answers.”

My heart shattered into a thousand pieces, just as it always does, when someone – anyone – lives with that kind of fear…that kind of self-loathing…that kind of numbness. My heart shattered because I’ve been there. I’ve numbed myself with food and alcohol and sex at different times in my life so that I could forget about the question. I’ve surrounded myself with stuff in the hope of burying the questions under piles of clothes and shoes and knick-knacks.

But the truth, my dear, is this: You cannot begin living until you begin to ask those questions.

I would never lie to you and say that this is easy. I would never lie to you and say that it instantly changes the world.

I can tell you, though, that when you begin to release yourself from the layers and years of numbing what your heart and soul are crying for, you will begin to feel alive. The passions that begin to blossom in your heart will also begin to burn away the fears. Loving yourself, and accepting yourself as you are in the moment, will push away the moments of loathing.

Love will begin to replace fear.

I can tell you that getting right within your own soul is the path to healthier and happier relationships. Because, Darling, if you don’t make your relationship with yourself healthy, then none of your others will be healthy.

I’ll be even more honest with you: I don’t have the exact answers for what you need to be happy and what you need to feel sexy and alive. But I do have something that will guide you along to those answers that only you can unearth: the questions.

When we arrive at the question, the answer is already near. ― Ralph Waldo Emerson

I have other things I can offer you.

I can share with you the obstacles and discoveries I made along the path I traveled as I went from my own days of numb existence into this life that I am in so in love with.

I have an open and loving and empathetic heart. A heart that understands more than you can imagine. A heart that sends you love and wishes of joyful arias and a zest for living. Above all, I have a heart and soul that will never judge you as you unwind your own heart and soul from the years and years of tamping down what you really want.

I may not hold the exact answers, but I know that deep inside yourself, you do. I can offer you my heart and soul, my hands and arms.

I can offer you virtual coffee and chocolate cake.

Make a leap of faith in your life and discover what you really want. Take a tiny courageous step. Begin your journey to the clearest, shiniest, most passionate and sexiest version of YOU.

Invest in yourself.  Darling, I’m here for you.

Are you ready to ask the questions and discover your answers?  Are you ready to clear your mind but not sure where to start? Need a little help uncovering the answers? Realize you’re not quite sure what questions to even ask yourself? 30 Days to Clarity: Clearing Brain Clutter – Discovering Your Heart’s Desires is a loving place to start.

Now Available as a Fully-Downloadable Course.

Upon signing up you’ll receive a workbook containing all 30 lessons. There are also dozens of worksheets and writing prompts to take you from cobwebs in your brain to a clear thinking and the ability to listen to the small, still voice of your heart.

No more waiting for the course to begin or that next email. You can begin at any time.

ClarityPurchaseButton
Designed to help you clear out the brain clutter that is drowning out the voices of your heart and soul. You’ll gain clarity by getting to know yourself and what the core of you really want.

You deserve to fall head over heels in love with your life. Because, darling, you can fall in love with your life when you dive into your inner wisdom and unleash your answers.

The Investment: $21

What Does Your Heart Most Desire?

Tell me, darling: What do you want?  No.  I’m not talking about unlimited books, a trip to Paris, a perfect relationship or a killer wardrobe that fits your (now) size 4 svelte body.

I’m asking you what your heart most desires so that your soul can soar.

Don’t get me wrong.  There’s not a damned thing wrong with going to Paris, having an endless supply of books, being thin with a lovely wardrobe, and being in a loving relationship.  There are times when I have wanted all those things.

patience1The thing is, having any one – or all – of those things doesn’t automatically make life perfect.  Eventually, you’ll get tired of the perfect man and reading books in Paris café’s.  Because-  no matter where you go and who you are with – there you are.

You need to learn about your wants.  Not just the surface desires for physical things – and the roles society expects you to play.  If you don’t gain clarity around your deepest desires, then everything that is, on the surface, perfect, won’t feel that way.

There is no magic pill – no magic place – no magic person – that will “fix” things for you.

In fact, let me be clear: you are not broken and do not need to be fixed.   You just need to gain clarity around what you most want in life.

Maybe you’re like me: you’re just a little tarnished.

Sure, you’ve made your mistakes, but the emotional baggage, battle scars, grey hairs, and laugh lines are a part of your hero’s journey.  I know that they have been part of mine.

Know what clears away tarnish?  Polish.

And to be frank with you, I kind of like that patina of the tarnish on me.  I wear it well.  In fact, I’ve earned it.

Embracing the shiny – and tarnished – parts of me makes me more in love with who I am in this moment, who I was in the past, and who I will be tomorrow.

Look.  I know within the deepest recesses of my soul that you desire and deserve to be happy.  You deserve to be the most playful, sassy, and sexy version of you.

To dig around and uncover that,  you just may need a little help.

Let me help you.  Let me hand you a cloth and some polish and help you discover the shine that gleams beneath the layers of life.

I’m a big believer that being asked the right questions is the beginning to moving yourself along in the right direction.

And by right direction, it’s not one that anyone chooses but you.

Only you can define what happy looks like to you.  Only you can define what satisfaction feels like.

I know that this is scary territory for some.  I cannot tell you the umpteen times that I have sat across the table from (or at the other end of the phone) from someone who realized they were afraid of the answers even more than of the questions.   Change is scary for all of us.

But time, and time again, I have also witnessed the discovery of that one elegant idea or pivotal question that sparked that first step to begin living life fully.

Let me assure you, darling.  I have faith in you.

Faith that you  can find your heart’s desires.  That you can be happy.  That you can feel joyful and satisfied and proud.  Faith that you can discover the answers that are right there inside you.  Answers  that will guide you beyond the pain, the numbness, and the fear of simply existing.

It starts with facing the simple question of “What do I want”. And answering it with truth.

Tell me, darling, what one step can you take in the direction of your heart’s desires?

Are you ready to clear ask the questions that will lead you to your heart’s answers?  Are you ready to begin clearing the cobwebs from your mind?  30 Days to Clarity: Clearing Brain Clutter – Discovering Your Heart’s Desires is a loving place to start.

Now Available as a Fully-Downloadable Course.

Upon signing up you’ll receive a workbook containing all 30 lessons. There are also dozens of worksheets and writing prompts to take you from cobwebs in your brain to a clear thinking and the ability to listen to the small, still voice of your heart.

No more waiting for the course to begin or that next email. You can begin at any time.

ClarityPurchaseButton

The Best Tool For Clearing Mental Cobwebs

I’m a huge fan of clearing physical clutter as a path forward to gaining clarity.  Disorder, clutter, and undone spaces in your home stall you from creating, sabotage your productivity, and keep you from moving forward.

“Clutter is not just the stuff on your floor—it’s anything that stands between you and the life you want to be living.” — Peter Walsh

Let me tell you something, darling:  clutter in any form robs you of energy.

This includes not only physical clutter, but mental  and emotional clutter as well.   You know what physical clutter is.  Emotional clutter is hanging on to things like fear, anger, and resentment.  Mental clutter is when you have too many thoughts bouncing around in your mind. 

I’d love to help you clear all kinds of clutter in your life.  In fact, clients often come to me to help them shed all kinds of clutter from their worlds. Clutter in any form interferes with the ability to thrive.

I’ll be honest:  I have a personal and intimate relationship with all kinds of clutter and have changed my life by learning how to reduce and eliminate it.

One of the biggest challenges my clients discuss with me is around clutter.  Clients tell me about colliding thoughts and overwhelming to-do lists.   Important tasks are forgotten.  Long term desires and goals are ignored because there “isn’t enough time” to put them in our schedules.

Today, I wanted to focus on mental clutter – and share the best tool I know to reduce and eliminate mental clutter.

Simply put, the fastest way to clear brain clutter:  write stuff down.

Seriously.  The fastest way to clear brain clutter is to get it out of your head and onto paper.   Need a reason to grab a pen and get stuff out of your head and onto paper?

Here are sixteen reasons why:

  1. Writing stuff down frees up mental capacity so you can focus.
  2. Writing things down allows you get unstuck – because you have taken action.
  3. Writing stuff down allows you to filter past the automatic default thoughts.
  4. Writing things down allows you to take inventory.
  5. Writing stuff down allows you to choose where to put your focus.
  6. Writing things down allows you to delete from your life what is draining your energy.
  7. Writing stuff down makes it easier to take action.
  8. Writing things down allows you to take big and vague ideas from your head and whittle them down into manageable action steps.
  9. Writing stuff down allows you to refine your ideas.
  10. Writing things down helps you remember the details of important events before time fades the memories.
  11. Writing stuff down allows you to record moments of self realization.
  12. Writing things down helps you pinpoint what actions are easier and more effective in your life.
  13. Writing stuff down – like what you’ve accomplished and what you are grateful for –  helps your mind create new paths of positive thoughts.
  14. Writing things down helps you discover a new way of being that works better.
  15. Writing stuff down helps to remind yourself of new paths until they become habits.
  16. Writing things down will allow you to direct your precious energy towards creating the clear path to a life lived in the zone

When energy is consistently flowing out to things that don’t really matter or to things that distract you, you have to play tricks in order to get by.  It’s time to stop playing tricks to get by, my dear. 

It’s time to release your mental clutter.

I know it can be a challenge to just begin to write without some direction, so what if I could help you methodically baby step your way from mental clutter to clarity?

30 Days to Clarity:  Clearing Brain Clutter – Discovering Your Heart’s Desire is the answer.

Every day of the program, you will get an email with a prompt that will take swirling thoughts from your head, connect them with your heart’s desire and discover what sets your soul on fire.

Are you ready to clear your mind but not sure where to start? Need a little help uncovering the answers? Realize you’re not quite sure what questions to even ask yourself? 30 Days to Clarity: Clearing Brain Clutter – Discovering Your Heart’s Desires is a loving place to start.

Now Available as a Fully-Downloadable Course.

Upon signing up you’ll receive a workbook containing all 30 lessons. There are also dozens of worksheets and writing prompts to take you from cobwebs in your brain to a clear thinking and the ability to listen to the small, still voice of your heart.

No more waiting for the course to begin or that next email. You can begin at any time.

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Steer Your Heart to the Truth

What do you want?  It’s an innocuous question on the surface.

steeringA million times a day we make decisions: The black shoes instead of the brown. A tuna sandwich for lunch. An hour of reality TV and then an hour of reading before bed.

When I think of that question, my mind drifts to the Tom Hanks line from You’ve Got Mail: “The whole purpose of places like Starbucks is for people with no decision-making ability whatsoever to make six decisions just to buy one cup of coffee. Short, tall, light, dark, caf, decaf, low-fat, non-fat, etc. So people who don’t know what the hell they’re doing or who on earth they are can, for only $2.95, get not just a cup of coffee but an absolutely defining sense of self: Tall. Decaf. Cappuccino.”

We make a gazillion decisions on any given day, so of course we know what we want.

Right?

Well. If you’re like a lot of people, the answer to “what do you want” may come out “I don’t know.”

I hear it often. I’ve been known to utter these words myself. (In fact, as recently as two months ago, I was called on it by a dear friend when I answered a question about my writing this way.)

The truth, my dear, is this: you do know. At least, the deepest part of your heart knows.

Sometimes the answer to the question “what do you want” is rarely“I don’t know,” but instead comes out as a shopping list of “shoulds” revolving around perfection. Answers like “I want to be a perfect wife, mother, and employee.”

Feeling the need to “be perfect” sets us up for a constant dialogue with our Inner Critic. We base our idea of perfection on the outside world views: a white picket fence, baking cookies, and being a hot sex-kitten for our man. (Or for my guys out there, it’s working hard to bring home the bacon, playing a great game of golf and one-on-one basketball, and being the strong, supportive, sensitive partner at all times.)

Now, while I’m a big lover of cookies – and I believe that you (yes, you) are a hotty-hot sex kitten deep inside, I’m here to tell you, darling, that continuing to strive for the perfection based on what the outside world – also known as “they” – should look like is a path to dissatisfaction with your life.

Look. I know to the depths of my soul that you desire – and fully deserve – to be happy.

To discover what your soul desires, though, you’re going to have to listen to your heart and soul for the truth. It’s about gently steering yourself in the right direction.

Only you can define what happy looks like to you. Only you can define what satisfaction feels like.

I know that this is scary territory for some. I cannot tell you the umpteen times that I have sat across the table from (or at the other end of the phone) from someone who realized they were afraid of the answers even more than of the questions. And then to be a witness to the discovery that the desire to begin living life is stronger than the pain, the numbness, and the fear of simply existing.

I have faith that you can find your heart’s desires. That you can be happy. That you can feel joyful and satisfied and proud.

It starts with facing the simple question of “What do I want”.  And answering it with truth.

If you are ready to explore now, begin by asking yourself these questions:

  • What is the best thing about my life?
  • What is my best quality?
  • How do I want to feel?
  • Why do I want to feel ________?
  • When I answer “what” I want, what is the first thing that comes to mind?
  • Why do I want _________?
  • What do I know I don’t want in my life?
  • How can I begin to let go?

Are you ready to clear your mind but not sure where to start? Need a little help uncovering the answers? Realize you’re not quite sure what questions to even ask yourself? 30 Days to Clarity: Clearing Brain Clutter – Discovering Your Heart’s Desires is a loving place to start.

Now Available as a Fully-Downloadable Course.

Upon signing up you’ll receive a workbook containing all 30 lessons. There are also dozens of worksheets and writing prompts to take you from cobwebs in your brain to a clear thinking and the ability to listen to the small, still voice of your heart.

No more waiting for the course to begin or that next email. You can begin at any time.

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Designed to help you clear out the brain clutter that is drowning out the voices of your heart and soul. You’ll gain clarity by getting to know yourself and what the core of you really want.

You deserve to fall head over heels in love with your life.

The Investment: $21

Swing Into a Life You Love

I have spent the bulk of this past week virtually unplugged. I’ve also been in bed before 9:30 almost every night this week, had a long lunch with 21744010670513344_iPBV1YUh_ca good friend, and lingered over a glass of wine while listening to work stories from my partner and his colleagues.

At the same time, I’ve worked on a re-design of this website (which is almost *there*), chatted with clients and connected with some fellow coaches.

It’s been a damned good week.

It’s been a week where I’ve walked my talk.

I’ve indulged in some extreme self-care by listening to my body (lots of extra rest) and my soul (by unplugging from the internet).

I’ve fallen more deeply in love with my partner (damn I adore that man).

I’ve embraced what I love about my life and staying on path to what my number one priority is.

All because I am crystal clear about what my heart and soul desires.

Darling: life is short.

If you forgo sleep for work on a regular basis, your work will become less brilliant because your body needs rest. If you forgo connection with your partner or friends, the threads of connection grow weak.

If you forgo laughter because life is serious, then my love, you are missing the point of life.

Life is serious, yes – and it isn’t a bed of roses all the time, but it can be amazing if you allow it. You deserve joy and laughter into your world.

Get in touch with what your heart and soul wants. Get crystal clear about your priorities. Keep those priorities at the forefront of mind as you traverse through your days.

If you are struggling with what you want – or feel that you are simply observing your life instead of living it – I have created a class that will help you clear brain clutter.

Not every day is perfect and we all hit some bumps along the way, but on the whole big picture of things, it should even out to being a damned good week for you too.

If it’s not, then we should chat, sweetheart. Because you deserve it.

If you aren’t madly in love with your life, then now is the time to swing into a life that you are in love with.

As I said, my dear: life is short.

Are you ready to clear your mind but not sure where to start? Need a little help uncovering the answers? Realize you’re not quite sure what questions to even ask yourself? 30 Days to Clarity: Clearing Brain Clutter – Discovering Your Heart’s Desires is a loving place to start.

2015 – Course Dates:

Now Available as a Fully-Downloadable Course.

Upon signing up you’ll receive a workbook containing all 30 lessons. There are also dozens of worksheets and writing prompts to take you from cobwebs in your brain to a clear thinking and the ability to listen to the small, still voice of your heart.

No more waiting for the course to begin or that next email. You can begin at any time.

ClarityPurchaseButton

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